Wednesday, December 31, 2014

Welcome 2015

 
 
Good resolutions are simply checks that men draw
on a bank where they have no account.
Oscar Wilde
 
Wishing all of you faithful followers
a Happy New Year!

Tuesday, December 30, 2014

Did You Just Burn Your Clothes?

Martin Moone: Did you just burn all your clothes?
Padraic: Yeah
Martin Moone: What are you going to do now?
Padraic: I should probably go home.

Did you just burn your clothes
 
Have you ever had an impulsive thought? Has there ever been a time when you have thought well everybody else is doing it so why not? But is it always a good idea to follow the pack? Well, we all know the answer to that is no. But how do you handle those times when you do something that you regret?
 
1. Admit It
 
Don't try to hide the truth from everyone. You may not want to advertise it, but don't deny that you had a wild and crazy moment. People have more respect for individuals who admit they make mistakes. Everybody makes them. It just means you're human.
 
2. Embrace the Moment
 
If you have a moment when you use poor judgment, find the humor in situation. These times always make for great stories. Look at the humor. You may be embarrassed for a little while, but you've lived a little.
 
3. Don't Make It a Lifestyle
 
Everybody has a story about when they did something a little out of character. They make life interesting, but if you find that you are acting impulsive on a weekly or daily basis. You are probably just starting to make bad life choices. There can be serious consequences for being too impulsive. It's probably time to start looking at the causes of all of the impulsiveness.
 
So if you are like young Padraic from Moone Boy who burnt his clothes, take it in stride. You'll live through the embarrassment.
 
 Music to blog by Paint the Moon by The Czars
 


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Monday, December 29, 2014

My Five Favorite Posts From 2014

As the year is drawing to a close it is time to look back at posts that I have written. This year has been packed full of big events. And many of the posts I've written in the last year have reflected what is going on in my life. So here is my list.

Probably the biggest event in my life this past year was the death of my father. My dad was a great guy who everybody loved. As I read back through the posts I wrote my favorite one from that time period is Captain Optimism. My dad always taught us to look for the positives in life. And he really was a champion of optimism.
 
Yes, this year brought another birthday. It brought celebrations and gifts. And my absolute favorite gift was given to me by my friend Gloria. She gave me My Name In Lights. It's time to give her another shout out for the fabulous gift.
 



This year as always I thought about quite a few things. One of the things was gentleness. My post The Gentle Hands was the result. It's my thoughts on what it means to be gentle.

 


As always I looked for some creative recipes and my absolute favorite, and the biggest surprise of the them was Zombie Apocalypse Pizza. Yes, spam will be a mainstay of all of our lives if the zombies take over the world. And who could live without pizza? Here's how I solved the problem just in case it really does happen.
 
And of course I changed jobs earlier this year. So post on To Leave or Not to Leave was one of my favorites. While I have to admit all the overtime that came along with my new job this Christmas time was difficult, I am much happier at this job than I was at my previous job.
 

So these are my favorite posts. Take a look at them and let me know what you think, and has your year brought you?
 
Music to blog by Take It Out On Me by Chairlift
 

Sunday, December 28, 2014

I Survived Christmas

Christmas is a wonderful time of year isn't it? But I am always glad that I survived Christmas. There were moments when I just didn't think it was going to happen. You see I had to work tons of overtime. So bank account got a huge Christmas present, but I didn't get to do all of the things I wanted to do during the Christmas season. I am thankful that I have survived the Christmas season. And no I am not looking forward to next Christmas, but I am extremely happy that things will return to some sort of normal. Whatever that means. I will have a little more time to do things I enjoy, and well that means I will once again be able to post on my blog and read other blogs the way I want to. So let me know how you all survived the Christmas chaos.



Music to blog by A Foggy Day by Buddy DeFranco
 
 
 
 

Saturday, December 27, 2014

Lemon Orzo With Pine Nuts

So Christmas is over and the New Year's Eve parties will be here next week. Many of you will need something to take to those New Year's parties. Here's a simple dish that tastes great, and of course it tastes great.


Lemon Orzo With Pine Nuts

Here's What You Need

2 cups cooked orzo
1/2 cup pines nuts
1 cup of fresh spinach leaves
1 cup cherry tomatoes
1/2 cup olive oil
1 tsp soy sauce
1 freshly squeezed lemon
1 clove minced garlic

Here's What You Need to do

Mix the first four ingredients together. Now mix the remaining ingredients in a separate bowl. Then mix in the liquids with the orzo mixture.

Music to blog by Feel Good Drag by Anberlin




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Saturday, December 20, 2014

Christmas Shopping Challenge Update

This Christmas I took up a challenge when it came to buying my Christmas presents. If you read my post The Christmas Shopping Challenge you can learn more about it.

 
The heart of the challenge is to make sure that I am buying gifts that actually support what I believe. So how has this challenge going? 

Well there have been a lot of challenges. Since I decided that I wanted the gifts I purchased to either be made in the USA, eco-friendly, or fair trade products. I had some hunting to do. I found that shopping at some of the bigger stores the challenge was almost impossible. So I had to get really creative with some of the gifts. Here's a Chocolate Lover's Basket that I put together as one gift.

This is how it turned out. Everything that would keep a chocolate lover happy. So how did it develop. I know someone who absolutely loves chocolate. And well it is pretty easy to find fair trade chocolates if you go to the right places. So I decided to build a present around this. I'd eaten Divine Chocolate products before and I knew that it's great chocolate. The chocolate beans are farmed in Ghana. And the farmers manage the sale of their own beans. It's fair trade at it's best. I also included a Equal Exchange chocolate bar. All of this took was a trip to the local health food shop. That was the easy part.
 
What else do chocolate lovers want? I decided hot chocolate would be a good move. This wasn't as easy as I thought it would be. I look at a lot of packages and I discovered that most food doesn't really say where it is made. It might say it was packaged in the USA, but was it made in the USA? Finally a trip to Whole Foods solved the problem. The answer was Silly Cow Farms Hot Chocolate. It was a natural food product that is made by a small company based out of Vermont. Bingo! I ran by the local Goodwill to pick up a basket and found a cute mug to go with the hot chocolate.
 
Then I decided that S'mores would also be a great idea for chocolate lovers. This is where things really got difficult. Hard as I looked I could not figure out if the chocolate graham crackers and the marshmallows I decided on were made in the USA or fit into the category of fair trade or eco-friendly. Hard as I looked the packaging didn't state where the items were made. And I went to several different grocery stores. I finally decided that I had done the best I could and just purchased each.

So this present turned out to meet all of my criteria I think.

I found through this challenge that it was extremely difficult to find out where products are made. I looked online. I looked at packages. And I also found that some of the wording on labels. I searched online for products that were made in the USA, eco-friendly, or fair trade. I searched high and low in many of the big box stores. I was sad to see that I could barely find things in the big box stores that fit the criteria. And I also found it difficult when I searched online to find out where items were made. I had to do a little research on companies. I was also a little surprised that I didn't spend that much more on gifts that met all the criteria. We all complain that these items cost more, but when push came to shove. I spent about the same amount of money I would spend on gift baskets made from items that I had no clue where the items were made.

So was my challenge a success? Yes, I originally decided to purchase 75% of my gifts that were one of the three criteria. I was able to do this. But it took work. But I believe it was well worth the work. It took seeking out different sources for Christmas shopping, but it made the Christmas gift giving experience all more satisfying.

Music to blog by All I Want for Christmas is My Two Front Teeth by Alvin and the Chipmunks
 
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Thursday, December 18, 2014

I Dodged a Bullet

Have you ever had one of those times when you have an assignment at work, and you think that's not fair. You are getting ready to say that isn't right. And something tells you this isn't the time to say anything. That's what happened to me last week, and I dodged a bullet.

I have had to work every Saturday afternoons for several months. It gets kind of old so I was excited when a new person was hired at my job. I thought finally I will get a couple of Saturday afternoons off. We could rotate the Saturday afternoons. I thought for sure I would have last Saturday afternoon off, but I was scheduled to work. I thought to myself this is unfair. I am tired of being here on Saturday afternoons. I was getting ready to tell my boss, and something told me don't say anything this time. So I kept my mouth shut.

I went into work on Saturday afternoon, and I found out that the morning did not go well. There was more work than could be done on time, and the machines that were supposed to assist us were not working correctly. The afternoon went smoothly. I didn't have to deal with the chaos they experienced in the morning. So I guess the point is sometimes it's best to let things be. It's just knowing when you need to say something and when you should be quiet that is the difficult thing.

Music to blog by Good by Better Than Ezra

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Sunday, December 14, 2014

Those Christmas Extras Roundup

Each week I am a co-host of the Wake Up Wednesday Linky Party. It's so much fun to see what everyone's wonderful posts. Here are few of the posts that involve those Christmas extras. You know they don't fit into a nice category, but they are way cool.

 
I absolutely loved Tela's idea of a Grinch dinner. Check out the post at Sweet Southern. It's a tradition that more people should take up.
 
 
My Top 10 Christmas Albums contains a list of great Christmas music from all genres over at The Ramblings of an Aspiring Small Town Girl. The list includes everything from Hawaiian music to punk. It's a great list you should check out.
 
And since this post is all about Christmas Renee over at Doorkeeper came up with a great post on Christmas gifts we all can give.
 
Music to blog by Chalk It Up to the Blues by Big Sandy and His Fly Rite Boys
 

 
 
 



Thursday, December 11, 2014

Roasted Roots

Fall and winter is a great time for all of those rooty vegetables. And once you get all of the chopping done they are pretty easy to cook. Here's a recipe for roasted roots.

 
 
Here's what you need
 
1/2 cup of chopped apples
1/2 cup of chopped daikon radishes
1/2 cup of chopped carrots
1/2 cup of chopped onions
1/2 cup of chopped beets
1/2 cup of chopped butternut squash
2 cloves chopped garlic
1/4 cup olive oil
2 tablespoons thyme
1 tablespoon sage
2 tablespoons rosemary
the juice from one fresh lemon
 
Preheat oven to 475 degrees
Now combine all of the items in a bowl and mix well.
Now place the items in a roasting pan.
Roast the vegetables for 35 minutes stirring the vegetables every 10 minutes.
 
Music to blog by Matin by The Holy Boys
 
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Tuesday, December 9, 2014

Christmas Cookie Recipe Roundup

Here are some absolute fabulous Christmas Cookie Recipes I found this past week on the Wake Up Wednesday Linky Party.

Almost Supermom's Pretty Darn Healthy Chocolate Peppermint Cookies really are pretty healthy she uses coconut sugar instead of refined sugar so the cookies really don't have all that processed sugar in them. And they look delightful.

Nicola over at Pink Recipe Box came up with some Triple Chocolate Christmas Cheesecake Cookies that look so yummy.

Ever bite into a ginger snap and think it would be so nice if this was just a little bit more chewy? Julie over at Sweet and Spicy has a recipe for Soft Gingersnap Cookies.

So these are some of the great recipes over at the Wake Up Wednesday Linky Party. Go over and see what there is to check out this week.

Music to blog by Among the Sugar Pines by Ethan Jones


Monday, December 8, 2014

Baby Bye Bye

I was so happy when I heard a new song Baby Bye Bye by my favorite band Kitty Daisy and Lewis.

Rockabilly Music
 
So why do I like this song so much? One reason is their music is catchy. Their new song has a really melody that sticks with you. The song makes you want to sing along. The next reason I like their new song so much is that while the melody is light and fun the lyrics are a little darker. They've paired a song that has a cute melody with lyrics that are all about a break up. We've all heard songs like it. Oh, your singing along saying this song is so much fun. And then as you're singing along you realize this isn't really a happy song. And the other reason I like this song is the video. It's fun. It made me smile as I watched it. It starts out sweet and innocent. And then well things go wrong for one of the individuals in the video. You have to watch it to see what I mean.
 

 


See what I mean. I had to ask myself the question should I really like this song so much after I watched the video?  And I decided yes, it's fun. Even though it gets a little twisted.

So let me know what you think of the song.

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Thursday, December 4, 2014

This One Time At Disney World

I love visiting Disney World. It's fun. It's full of happy memories. Everyone young and old is running around with funny hats on. But this one time at Disney World things weren't so great.

This is where all the trouble started. Yes, the tea cup ride at Disney World. It's a ride for children. But what I didn't understand as a child was the more you spin that wheel in the center of the tea cup the more you spin around. Well it was a hot morning in Florida since it was August. And I just starting spinning that wheel. The ride ended, and that is when I really learned what the word vertiginous means. You see the ride stopped spinning, but the world didn't stop spinning for me.

In fact the world continued to spin the entire day. You haven't lived until you've ridden the It's a Small World ride and everything is kind of spinning around. It wasn't until I returned a couple of years later that I realized that things on that ride weren't going in circles.

I guess the important thing that I learned that day at Disney World was that I really ought to know which direction I want to go in before I turn the wheel.

Music to blog by It's a Small World


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Tuesday, December 2, 2014

Spinach Lasagna

Like the cartoon character Garfield. I love lasagna.

I especially love spinach lasagna.
 

So here's a recipe for spinach lasagna that I love.
 
Here's what you need
 
2 cups of shredded mozzarella cheese
2 teaspoons dried Italian seasoning
1 teaspoon dried crushed red pepper
2 10 oz package of frozen chopped spinach thawed and drained
1 15 oz carton ricotta cheese
1 cup sliced mushrooms
1 jar pasta sauce
9 cooked lasagna noodles
 
Here's what you do
Preheat the over to 375 degrees.
Combine 1 1/2 cups of mozzarella cheese and the five ingredients in a bowl.
Spread 1/2 cup of pasta sauce in the bottom of a baking dish.
Next arrange 3 noodles over the pasta sauce.
Then spread one third of the spinach mixture over the pasta.
Repeat the process two more times.
Then sprinkle the remaining mozzarella cheese over the top.
Now cover and bake for 50 minutes.
Remove the cover and bake for another 10 minutes.
Let the lasagna stand for 10 minutes before cutting.
 
Music to blog by Foulbrook by Two Inch Astronaut
 
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Sunday, November 30, 2014

Orphan Mothers

So I'm going through the notifications on my twitter page the other day and I notice that this band called Orphan Mothers has started to follow me. I had never heard of them, but I decided to check out their link to bandcamp.

Orphan Mothers is a duo from the Regina, Saskatchewan. It is comprised of Jon Neher who writes the music and Eden Rohatensky who sing and writes the lyrics. And they have released a single called Towers.

 
So what does this duo's music sound like? Well it's a little ethereal. It's use of electronics and Eden's airy voice have worked out really well. So the song is relaxing to listen to. And with all the chaos surrounding the holidays an evening with some relaxing music is something we all can use. But the music isn't the only good thing about the release. Eden's lyrics are solid. She sings about the times you think about the good things in a relationship. They are a perfect match for the music. They have found that spot in music where the lyrics and music compliment each other. Neither one of them tries to outshine the other. But instead they work together. This is a great first from this duo, and I hope that there will be more to come from this duo.
 

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Saturday, November 29, 2014

I've Gotta Be Me

Have you ever heard that song I've Gotta Be Me? You know the one that was made so popular by Sammy Davis Jr.?


This is the song that came to mind when I read a blog post. The post was all about how being beautiful is all about being you. The line from the song I can't be right or somebody else if I'm not right or me. It occurred to me that the truly beautiful individuals I know aren't afraid to be themselves. They know that there are things they do that others believe are kind of different. They often don't dress like other individuals. They have decided that they will work at jobs that provide them with more fulfillment than jobs that would often pay more.



As I continued to think about beauty and inner beauty. I realized that in order to find the beauty in myself I have had to do things a little differently myself. It means that I don't feel obliged to purchase the newest styles. It means that I am fine liking things that other individuals don't like. It means that I am comfortable spending time at home because I feel like I need to rest instead of running all over the place because people insist that I need to spend time with them. It also means that I feel comfortable believing what I believe. It means that I am not afraid to be guided by my inner voice instead of following convention.

It seems that beauty to me isn't found on the cover of Vogue, but instead by the strength that I find in myself to enjoy what I truly enjoy in life.

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Friday, November 28, 2014

The Christmas Shopping Challenge

So Black Friday is here. The most anticipated shopping day of the year. So the Christmas shopping challenge has begun for the year 2014. And this year I have challenged myself to spend more money on items Made in the USA. I want to purchase items that are Eco-friendly, and I also want to purchase items that are Fair Trade Certified.

 
So can I do it? Can 75% of the gifts that I purchase this year qualify in one of these three categories? Why this challenge? Well if each of us spend $64 of our Christmas budget on products made in the USA it will create 200,000 jobs. Fair trade products assure that individuals are paid a fair wage for the work they do. And eco-friendly products reduce the amount of trash we put into the world. All of these seem to be good reasons to take the challenge.
 
So follow me through this Christmas shopping challenge, and join in if you like. It can make a little difference in the world we all share.
 
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Thursday, November 27, 2014

Decorating For Christmas DIY Style

Once again it's time to look at some of the great things that have come out of the Wake Up Wednesday Linky Party. There are always tons of great posts at the linky party. And here are some of the decorating for Christmas DIY style posts that I think are fabulous.

The first is a fantastic tutorial on creating fresh Christmas wreaths. The wreath looks fantastic and makes me want to go out get the supplies to make it this weekend. Okay, maybe on Monday when the stores are a little less crowded. But I do want one of these wreaths.

 
DIY Fresh Christmas Wreaths
 
 
The second is link has a bunch of ideas to decorate your home based on items you can find at Big Lots. My absolute favorite is the Christmas mantle idea. I mean how simple, and it looks so great.
 
 
Simple DIY Holiday D├ęcor #BigHoliday @BigLots
 
 
And the last Christmas decoration is a Pine Cone Christmas Man. I love how the DIY uses items that cost nothing and encourage individuals to get outside and see what the world has to offer. The pine cones can be collected from outdoors. So they are free.
 
 
Anne from Upstate Ramblings came up with the post and it has a tutorial to make it easy peasy to make.
 
Music to blog by Soul Food by Cylus Chestnut

 
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Wednesday, November 26, 2014

Monday, November 24, 2014

The Great Thanksgiving Stuffing Incident

There are so many things to look forward to about Thanksgiving. There is the parade, the football, the time with the family. And if you're my sister in law, Kris, there is the stuffing.

This is Kris. She is the center of this Thanksgiving stuffing story.
Made with FreeOnlinePhotoEditor.com

Yes, she is a stuffing lover. A couple of years ago I spent the Thanksgiving holiday with my brother and his family. Kris got up early on Thanksgiving like so many individuals and began the annual preparations. The bird needed to be prepared and of course stuffed.

 
She labored over the stuffing. She proclaimed how much she loved stuffing. Her eyes had a dreamy quality. She was dreaming of tasting that stuffing. She had a content look on her face. Her labor over the stuffing was one of love.
 
Throughout the morning the aroma of the turkey filled the house. Finally the bird was done and the stuffing could be removed. Kris placed the stuffing in a glass bowl. She was so looking forward to this stuffing. The bowl was set aside and the carving began. Then things went all wrong. The was a loud shattering sound. We all looked around. The stuffing bowl had been placed on the stove top, and well it was on a burner. And the burner had been left on. This is the movie scene that flashed through my mind
 

 


The look of disgust was like that of the father in A Christmas Story. And I wondered if she would burst into tears like the mother. Kris is a tough northern girl, and she was not giving up on her stuffing. Once the initial shock was over she ran to her precious stuffing. Could any be salvaged? We dared not laugh. And the oh, no's rang through the house. Kris inspected the bowl. Yes, as she examined the bowl she stated that it had cracked along the bottom of the bowl so the stuffing at the top of the bowl was safe. It would be possible for each of us to have some stuffing at Thanksgiving.
As friends and I texted each other about family fiascos. The Thanksgiving stuffing incident was deemed the winner of story of the year.

To all of you stuffing lovers out there may this Thanksgiving be free of stuffing disasters.

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Sunday, November 23, 2014

Effective Communication Styles

This is Smokey, the cat, and I believe that I should address what I believe are effective communication styles.

 My roommates and I all have varied means of communicating with our pet human. Some of them are more effective than others. Today, I going to address the cry. Some of you humans may call it the meow.

My young roommate Bobaloo is a small cat, but she has a very loud and demanding cry. In fact there are times when she is just annoying. I know that everyone human and feline in the house agrees with this. There are times when she just walks through the house screaming for hours. No joke she really does do this. It just gets on my nerves when she does this. This is not really an effective means of communication. Screaming for hours on end just makes everyone ignore you. And I am always relieved when my pet human has simply had enough and tells Bobaloo to shut up.

My roommate Captain is large fellow with a puny cry. He cries daily, and he believes that if he cries someone will listen to him. I believe this is a hit or miss way of communicating. The sympathy cry is kind of pathetic. Yes, the pet human feels bad sometimes and gets him what he wants, but just as often this cry is ignored. This in my opinion is not acceptable. And I believe it is part of the reason he has to constantly be next to our pet human in order to get the attention he desires.

I believe that my method of communication is the most effective. I cry seldom. But when I do I let out a loud ringing roar. After all I am a miniature lion so my cry must be forceful. And it is. When I cry everyone looks. I get quality attention, and I am able to obtain exactly what I want. So my advice to felines and humans is cry seldom, but when you do cry make sure it counts.

Music to blog by People are Strange by The 69 Cats
 
 
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Saturday, November 22, 2014

Being Thankful

Thanksgiving is coming and hopefully we are all thinking about things we are thankful for. But this Thanksgiving I've thought about things and I wondered is giving thanks the same as being thankful?

 
So I thought about what is giving thanks. To me giving thanks is telling others the things that you are thankful for. Not just on occasions, but on a regular basis. Not just the big things in life, but the things we take for granted. I thought to myself I do a pretty good job with this. I am thankful for so many things.
 
But when I thought what is the difference between being thankful and giving thanks. I thought giving thanks is a one time action. And being thankful is a constant lifestyle. You see it seems to me that giving thanks is the first step in a taking on a lifestyle of being thankful.
 
So I thought to myself, am I constantly thankful? Well, no, in all honesty, I don't think it's a constant. I am thankful for the good things that happen to me. And there are many good things that happen to me all the time. There are times when I am amazed at the good things that happen to me. But when problems arise I am struggle with seeing the good in it.
 
I know that something good comes out of everything. I thought to myself I so often so that there is a problem. But in reality, it is a challenge. A challenge provides an individual with the opportunity to grow. And well growth usually isn't comfortable. And once again if I am honest I don't like to be uncomfortable.
 
So I guess my personal challenge is learning how to be thankful when the opportunities for growth come along. To me it seems like a big challenge. And I'm still figuring it out, but I do know that I believe that we need to give thanks for the good things in life. And then we need to move past that attitude toward the lifestyle of being thankful.
 
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Faithful Followers are you looking for a link party that will challenge you? Check out the weekly linky challenge at Be Still Be Free
 
 
 
 
 
 
 


Friday, November 21, 2014

The 69 Cats

Did you ever watch the show True Blood? You know the one about vampires?

If you did you remember that opening song with the lyrics I want to do bad things to you. I always knew the song was a great intro song for the show, but I never knew who recorded the song until well yesterday. I found out it was the band The 69 Cats.

 
 
 
So what makes this band so appealing? For me it's that voice. Jyrki69 is the person behind that voice. The voice is deep, it's rich, it's spooky! Then of course there is the bass in the music. Chopper Franklin is the bassist. Punk fans probably know the name he's from that famous band The Cramps. And then there is Danny B. Harvey on guitar. It has that perfect twang. And the heartbeat of the band on drums is Clem Burke. So the band has a solid lineup of experienced musicians. Many of the songs they play are covers of well known songs that include; People are Strange, Sweet Transvestite, and Runaway. They classify themselves as a dark rockabilly band. And I would say that's a pretty good match. The songs they play are traditional songs with a dark feeling and of course that great rockabilly sound. The band just focuses on having a good time with the music they play. And they do a great cover of She's Not You that has Wanda Jackson.
 
 
I guess the point of all this is I'm now a fan of The 69 Cats and I hope you all like their music as much as I do. Check out their website and maybe you can see them play live.
 
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Thursday, November 20, 2014

DIY Stocking Stuffers

Before you know it Christmas will be here. And those crafty individuals that participate in the Wake Up Wednesday Linky Party have posted some great projects that will be great DIY stocking stuffers.

 
Noreen over at Crafty Journal has put together a simple craft using cardboard as stickers as the main materials.
 
 
 
Janel over at A Mom's Take put together a simple, but adorable reindeer made from a towel. It's perfect for wrapping a small gift like soap.
 
 
Teresa over at Keeping It Real put together a tutorial on a sticky note holder. It's functional and cute!
 
 
And yeah, who doesn't need gloves for Christmas, they are a great stocking stuffer. Katie F. over at You Brew My Tea put together these no sew fingerless gloves. Yes, I did say they were a no sew project bonus!
 
These are a few of the great links you'll find at the Wake Up Wednesday Linky Party. Go add your link and let everybody see what you've been up to.
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

Dear Single Mothers

Dear Single Mothers:

I want to say thank you for all the hard work you do with your children. I believe that it must be difficult to raise a child on your own, and that there are many sacrifices that you have to make in order to care for your children. This is admirable.

Now having said this, I do have an issue or two I would like to take up with you. And there are many of you who will be very angry with what I say. But I'm going to say it anyway.



The first issue is the work place. Do you all really think it is fair for you to start a job and demand a better work schedule than individuals who have worked there much longer than you. And the simple reason an employer needs to provide this perfect schedule for you is because you have a child? I have heard this so many times over the years. Yes, I do believe employers need to work with you. I believe that they need to make reasonable efforts to cater to you and your responsibilities. But I believe the key word there is reasonable. It is reasonable for your co-workers to cover for you if on occasion your child is ill and you have to leave work early or miss a day of work. It is not reasonable for you to say that you are unable to work a shift on a rotated schedule because you have child care issues. Yes, you want the same pay as your co-workers, but you are not willing to do the same work as your co-workers. That is inconsiderate and selfish. Sorry it just is. Your co-workers may not have toddlers, but they do have parents, boyfriends, and friends who depend on them. These people are just as important as your toddler.

The second issue is disciplining your children. Trust me I do believe that it is difficult for single mothers. It is difficult for any mother. But I have observed many single mothers who are looking for other individuals to discipline their child. And I mean specifically they are looking for a boyfriend or spouse to discipline the child. It seems to me that you might be asking for trouble when you do this. Yes, they do need to help you, but they may not have the same ideas about how a child should act. That individual may believe that corporal punishment is okay, when you don't. Think about these things. Remember that bringing a boyfriend or new spouse into your child's life is a choice for you. It often isn't a choice the child is able to participate in. Most men are good, but there are some who aren't. It's your responsibility as a single parent to assure that your child is disciplined with the correct techniques that fit with your values.

I realize that there are those faithful followers who will say I am not being sympathetic to single mothers. I am sympathetic to them I believe that they do make unimaginable sacrifices. There are other faithful followers who will say I don't have the right to make statements about single mothers because I am not a single mother. I used to agree with that statement until one day a friend pointed out to me that I made all the right choices in not becoming a single parent, so I have just as much right as any single mother to voice my opinion. So I have. Single mothers I do value you, but keep in mind that all of us made choices in life. Your choice was to be a parent, and it's alright for you to expect for others to help you. It is alright for you to expect others to make some concessions on your behalf, but it is not alright to expect individuals to set limits on the concessions they make.

Music to blog by Modern Love by David Bowie
 
 
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